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CANDYMAN 1992

Turns out candyman's not a bad baby daddy. Who would have guessed.


As soon as you saw the name Clive Barker, you should have known this movie would be a horny and violent spookfest that's main goal is to scare the shit out if you. The opening of this movie reminds me of a Nosferatu, as the score that plays in the background is a massively breathy organ piece that just screams classic horror. It's exactly the type of overdramatic cheesiness that creepshow would use if done poorly, but the track feels very modern and does a hell of a great job setting a tone for this movie.


Especially when immediately paired with a massive squirming pile of bees that seem to engulf Chicago while Tony Todd gives you a 14 hour erection with his opening monologue. Even after this quite legendary opening, we immediately jump into Ted Rami being an awkward boyfriend character that is fun as hell to watch. The rest of this movie has a similar tone to URBAN LEGEND, but easily sets itself above that schlock with its instantly terrifying classic urban legend slasher.


Instead of feeling trapped in 2003, this movie feels right at home amongst other 90s classics of the genre. The plot focuses on Helen who is Intrigued by local legends, and investigates the myths and superstitions surrounding the one-armed Candyman. However, she confronts her worst nightmare when a series of murders start taking place. Helens investigating leads her to a lot of real life terrifying places, and the set design for all of it is incredible.


A lot of the plot has a lot of racial and social commentary that I am nowhere near qualified enough to talk about, however there is one scene in this movie I would love to talk about. After the first time Helen meets Candyman, she passes out / gets hypnotized and the screen fades to black. As someone who bore witness to a stabbing at my work not too long ago, this movie captures the feeling perfectly.


Suddenly all you can hear is screaming, and every surface is covered in blood. You have absolutely no idea how you got there, and the weight of the whole thing slams into you all at once. It's easily one of the most disturbing scenes I've seen in a very long time, and reminds me of some of Lynch's best work of pure chaos and violence.


All of this of course with Tony Todd's amazing monologues that are always powerful and horny as fuck. Just like Clive Barker always is, this movie is both violent and horny as shit. And.i love it.


Except Trevor is a total boner killer


10/10




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